Selecting a doula to guide and support you through your birthing and postpartum journey is an incredibly important decision, one that ideally brings you comfort and assistance. Yet, from my discussions with numerous parents, a common issue arises: the doula they chose wasn't the perfect match for them. More often than not, this mismatch isn't anyone's fault. The reality is that many parents, especially first-timers, are still exploring their personal preferences. You might initially prefer a doula who provides guidance from a distance, only to realize post-birth that you need someone more hands-on to lighten your load.
At Cradle & Coos, we recognize the importance of understanding and aligning with your unique needs. We are dedicated to facilitating a strong connection with a doula who truly suits you. To aid in this process, below are some key considerations and example questions that can help you find the right doula for your journey.
Step 1: Define Your Needs
Before initiating conversations with potential doulas, it's crucial to first identify your specific needs and expectations from their support. Factors such as the type of birth experience you envision, the degree of hands-on assistance you prefer, and any cultural or linguistic preferences should be considered. Having a clear understanding of these aspects will streamline your search, guiding you toward a doula who resonates with your childbirth philosophy and ensuring you ask pertinent questions. Below is a foundational template designed to help outline your preferences. It's important to note that this is distinct from a birth plan, which is more detailed; your doula can assist in its development later on.
Step 2: Build a short-list of doulas to interview
The process of finding the perfect doula can be overwhelming and inefficient for many moms-to-be. In our conversations with numerous mothers, we've observed that while some may end up interviewing as many as 10-15 doulas, others might hire the first one they meet. At Cradle & Coos, we aim to simplify this process by providing a meticulously curated list of the top three doulas tailored to our clients' needs. Our approach ensures optionality without adding stress during an already intense period in your life.
In case Cradle & Coos is not a good fit for your needs, some alternative sources are 1) seeking personal recommendations from friends and family who may have worked with a doula, 2) asking your hospital for recommendations or referrals to reputable sources, and 3) contacting NGOs focused on maternal health and equity that might know of community-based doulas in your area.
When initiating contact with potential doulas, it's critical to mention your due date right away. This ensures the doula’s availability aligns with your needs before advancing further in the selection process. Taking these steps helps streamline the search and selection of a doula, making it a more manageable and less stressful experience.
Step 3: Interview!
Interviewing potential doulas is key to evaluating their compatibility with your needs and values. Creating a list of questions covering their experience, training, support approach, availability, and role in various birth scenarios is essential. This interaction allows you to assess their communication style, expertise level, and your personal connection with them.
Given that interviews typically last only an hour, you may want to prioritize based on what's most important to you. When structuring your questions, starting with foundational questions before moving onto specifics allows for a natural flow that can help establish a connection and ensure all critical areas are covered. Below is a list of questions we've found most useful to ask, following that logic.
Introduction to Their Practice and Philosophy:
- What is your philosophy on birth?
- Why did you become a doula, and what do you love most about the work?
Compatibility and Approach:
- Tell me about how you collaborate with birthing families during labor.
- How do you involve and include my partner in the labor and birth process?
- What techniques do you employ to assist with labor and birth?
Experience and Training:
- How many years have you been a doula, and how many births have you attended?
- Can you tell me about your training and certifications?
- How do you keep your skills and knowledge up to date?
- Do you have special training in areas beyond labor and birth support?
Views on Medical Interventions and Unexpected Situations:
- Are there interventions or practices during labor and birth you are not comfortable supporting?
- How do you handle unexpected situations that may arise during birth?
Logistics and Availability:
- Do you work solo or with other doulas? What is your backup arrangement?
- How many prenatal and postpartum visits do you provide?
- When do you go on call for me? What if I go into labor outside your on-call time?
- When will you join me in labor, and how long do you stay after birth?
Support Equipment and Techniques:
- What items do you bring with you to a birth for support?
Connection with Health Care Systems:
- What has been your experience working with care providers and hospital staff, especially at my chosen birth location?
Client Feedback and References:
- Have you worked with clients who had similar needs or preferences to mine, and can you share their feedback?
- Can I consult any references or reviews from your past clients?
Financial Considerations:
- What is your total fee, and what services does it cover?
- Do you offer additional services for an extra charge, and what are they?
- What is your payment schedule, and do you require a deposit?
- Under what conditions do you offer refunds or provide financial assistance options?
Contingency Planning (“What Ifs”):
- What is your plan if you can’t make it to my birth?
- How do you manage if two clients are in labor simultaneously?
- What’s the protocol if I give birth before you arrive?
Step 4: Make a decision
Deciding on the right doula involves a balance of objective assessment and personal intuition. Reflect on whether the doula's expertise aligns with your birth plan, and importantly, if you and your partner felt a genuine connection and comfort with them. Consider if one doula's approach or knowledge stands out and whether you trust her to collaborate smoothly with your care team. In the end, trust your gut — it often tells you who is the best fit for your birthing experience.
